Being a feminist in Australia- I need feminisim so that The P.Ms boobs aren't a headline

Feminism is one of those things that I think people get sick of hearing about and females sometimes feel like they shouldn't talk about it because they don't want to sound preachy or annoying or be accused of 'playing the gender card'.


Cartoon by Cathy Wilcox SMH 14 Oct 2012

When Julia Gillard last week, spoke out on misogyny in politics, she was accused of exactly that and her speech seemed to invite even more misogynist attacks from other prominent Australian people.

While some took her words as something positive that probably should have been said a long time ago, many fought back with even worse comments than the ones that had previously caused her to speak out in the first place.

There was a lot of things that were said that pretty much suggested that misogyny is excusable and that she was overreacting by ah....well basically by doing nothing more than calling a spade a spade.

Now from talk of her cleavage...then a rude radio host suggesting that her partner was gay because he was a hair dresser.... to the many vicious attacks by the coalition, this past fortnight has been particularly brutal toward our P.M and if  you ask me, she has handled it with great poise




Feminism in Politics- Australia


I talk about our Prime Minister a lot.

People may think that this makes me an outspoken Labour voter.

First can I just say that I listed Labour as my SECOND option in the last election.

I just feel that she is hugely misrepresented in the media and that she says a great number of intelligent things and is for the most part, quite eloquent but is often advertised as being the opposite.
Considering all of the things she has had to put up with, I think she has handled it well.

For me and many others, this has only made us respect her more. I definitely think she is the strongest candidate for the face of our country right now.

My first vote last election was for Greens, even though I don't think the Greens alone have the experience to be a strong enough party to run this country on their own just yet.
My belief is that they will be in the future and they need as many seats as possible to be able to make real change.
Right now, I believe that a combination of The Greens and Labour is the best option for our country.

You may completely disagree, this is just my personal opinion and it’s open to debate.

We could probably talk more about policies amongst ourselves and learn more from our friends than we will learn from watching Channel 9...or apparently Sunrise for that matter





The Greens are forward thinking in a lot of ways and especially when it comes to feminism. They have a number of policies that I believe will help to pave the way for women in the future.
Their party alone is comprised of a much higher ratio of men-women than some other parties.


Whatever your political views are, it can not be overlooked that certain comments made by the coalition are inexcusable
(I have posted this picture already but I am posting it again)








Affirmative action



Affirmative action is frowned on by a lot of people...perhaps more specifically white, upper-class men.

Was that mean? Sorry...kind of

 “Why should some woman get a job that I am more qualified for?”

When you think of it on an individual case basis, it might tread on a few toes.
BUT the fact is job opportunities are being given to pave way for groups that may have otherwise been excluded from a specific area and not afforded the same opportunities in their past.

The same goes when talking about indigenous initiatives, people get mad and say dumb shit like

“Why do I miss out on something because I am white?”

These initiatives are about giving people opportunities that they may not have otherwise had.

While as a male, you might think personally that you are more qualified than another person to have a job, you have to ask yourself why there are not more women in that industry?

Is it because women can’t do that job? Or is it because there has never been the resources available for them to do that job?
That is why some scholarships and certain kinds of jobs are created specifically to help certain groups that might need a head start because they have been discriminated against in the past.

I know on the other side of things it can make the person getting the job feel uncomfortable.

‘Am I just getting the job to fill a quota?’

No. You are getting the job because you are an eligible candidate and somebody believes you will be good at it. Your work now will benefit other women in the future.

When it comes down to it, there are numerous studies that show that initiatives like affirmative action work.

When it comes to women being able to accelerate in the business world, their success assists other generations to move forward as well.

　Women Vs Women

Feminism has become a more offensive word than some actually offensive words. With prominent female celebrities there like Lady Gaga claiming

“I am NOT a feminist, — I hail men, I love men”



This shows the kind of negative connotation that can be associated with the word ‘feminism’.

Being a feminist is not about thinking that women are superior to men, it is about believing that women are EQUAL to men.

It's worrying when celebrities say things like this as they are looked up to by a younger generation of women who start to think 'Oh being a feminist isn't cool. Better not'

It shouldn't be a war females vs females







Sexism in young people


The amount of lady-shaming I see around is upsetting and it comes as much from other females as it does males.

I have worked in schools where I’ve heard an astounding amount of girls refer to each other as sluts based on how many sexual partners they have had.

I remember it from when I was in high school myself and the way that girls would talk about each other and I’d be lying if I say that I didn’t take part or pass judgement at some point or another.

Mean.Girls

　

Sex is a choice
‘Sleeping around’ is somehow a much more aggressive term when associated with women than it is with men.

In High School,

While a guy could have sex with several women within a short amount of time, what’s the bet that those several women will still be thought of as promiscuous?

(despite that each of them may not have been sleeping with anybody else, other than that one guy)

So the guy comes out looking victorious and gaining respect around his piers and the girls are left feeling ashamed and embarrassed.

From teaching sex- education in schools, I have come to learn how many young people are unaware of the risks. I don’t just mean the physical risks but the emotional risks too.

Too often I have spoken to young girls who didn’t want to have sex, were pressured into it or did it to make somebody like them.

These risks don’t decrease as women get older and sadly the stigma that comes with it doesn’t decrease either.

It is every adult women’s right to make choices about their own body. This means it is up to them to assess the risk involved with having sex with somebody and make a decision based on that risk.

Sadly females are faced with more than one problem that I believe many men don’t face.

While we can have as much sex as the average man, we are not treated equally when we do.
Men can boast about their sexual conquests but if women are to talk freely and do the same, from what I have seen, we face, what seems to be a multitude more criticism.

 A girl should be allowed as many sexual partners of her choosing without be labelled a slut.

People seem to ignore the deeper issues like 'If a girl is having a lot of sex due to self confidence issues- why are we calling her names instead of trying to help her?'
And what if a girl is just having sex because she likes it as much as men do?
Why shouldn't she enjoy the use of her genitals?

Then comes the talk. What if sex results in pregnancy?
This could be one big topic on it's own between religion and legislation that tries to stop women from making choices about their own body..instead of getting into that I'm just going to leave this over here...

　



Men should be feminists


Men should be feminists, as feminism has the potential to benefit them as much as it does women.

Your dad, your brother, your son your partner, they should all give a shit about how their gender is portrayed in the media.

It should upset them when people say things like “Oh she was asking for it” when rape occurs.

Does it not offend you when people imply that the only thing that is stopping men from raping women is clothing or being somewhere alone at night?

… if it was not for clothing and sunlight, you’d all be out on mass raping rampages everyday- right?

Obviously that is not true.

It should piss you off when people make those comments and you should stand up for yourself and stand up for the females you care about.

When you hear somebody being degrading to women, think

‘What if that was my mother? My sister? My daughter? My friend? How would I feel if somebody treated them that way?’



Ah Bill B


It still goes on


Some people are blind to the fact that sexism even exists, especially so close to home but I am sure most women can recall more than one occasion where they felt mistreated just for being female.

‘Women aren’t oppressed in western civilisation’ seems to be a common view

Several tests and studies show that this is not the case.

I will post a few links at the bottom of this page if you feel like reading up on stuff that will make you angry.

 
THAT'S SO SEXIST MAN!......(......uh Is it? Is it really?)


Women, like any other group need to be able to take the piss out of ourselves sometimes.

Often I will watch a comedian, saying things that are so funny that I can't breathe.
Then the next day I'll read a headline that says "Sexist remark by________" and you'll see that it has been completely taken out of context.

Before you read part of a joke in a news article and spread it around, telling all your friends how Louis C.K is a sexist prick who makes jokes about rape
...first find the original source and see the context that it was in, don't base your entire opinion of a person based on one thing that you have heard.

He, along with many other comedians and prominent people may often be misquoted but are actually fucking hilarious when their jokes haven't been portrayed in a way that is completely different from what was intended



Yes by all means, call out real sexism but learn when something is a joke and think about who is saying it.
 A lot of humour comes from giving the audience the benefit of the doubt,thinking that they are intelligent enough to realise the comedian is not being literal and more often than not, they are making a point and challenging societies perceptions, not expressing their own.

However some jokes have just run there coarse
'Get me a sandwhich' might have been funny the first time somebody said it but some people need some new material.
...Also if you are the kind of dude that says that stuff on the regular, I suspect  nobody is ever going to get you a sandwich...but you know, enjoy playing on your own dick for the rest of your life.
　

To me, feminism is about equal rights.
If you adopt a similar theory I feel like that means letting go of some outdated traditions.
I want to be respected and treated well by people because I am a person, not because I have a vagina.

So yeah that's sweet of you to open the door but we can split the bill.
'Also a Pimms and lemonade thank you waiter.'

I am not saying all traditions need to die in some kind of horrific Game Of Thrones way
....( I've never watched that show but I take it from my Facebook news feed that it was a pretty horrific end to the season... there was blood and stuff...yeah I really do not care about that show)

"Nah take it back"

  I just mean that I don't need for those traditions to be upheld.
Kind gestures are still kind gestures and that goes with anybody not just male/female relationships

I do get frustrated by girls who are all for feminism and crying "THAT'S SEXIST" when it suits but happy to constantly be ignoring reverse discrimination when it means that a guys going to a do a job for you, that you are capable of doing 'but shouldn't have to because you're a lady'

It's all give and take and  give dudes credit where credits due, because many of them are on our side.


When it comes to feminism, while Australia is way ahead in terms of the rest of the world, it's obvious from the past weeks that we still have far to go




Below are websites that may be of interest

Facebook:

I love this facebook page, check it out and like them.
They are always updating it with current articles
　

https://www.facebook.com/#!/DestroyTheJoint

Campaign. Who needs feminism?
I need feminisim so that The P.Ms boobs aren't a headline
 share why you need feminism

https://www.facebook.com/?ref=tn_tnmn#!/WhoNeedsFeminism?fref=ts

Want accurate information and coverage on the P.Ms cleavage?


http://nofibs.com.au/2013/06/17/the-truth-behind-the-cleavage/

Mental health - The stigma that comes with being diagnosed with a mental illness- My experience

Earlier this year I spent 2 months in a mental heath facility.

I mostly don't have too much trouble disclosing that I suffer from a mental disorder because for the most part I give people the benefit of the doubt that they are not overly judgemental, uneducated jerks that can't decipher the difference between schizophrenia and a serial killer.

...though every now and then I come across the kind of ill-informed wanker that just does not get it.

I acknowledge for some people, their judgement stems largely from the way that mental illness is portrayed in the media.

Recent campaigns are helping to wipe out the stigma associated with people living with a mental illness but we still have a long way to go.

Much like any intolerance, I find that once people know more about it or live with somebody suffering from a mental illness that their mind can be changed

I have written this blog entry including my thoughts and retorts to some of the things that people say when it comes to mental illness. These are all variations of things that I have heard people say or that people have said to me.

“In the olden days people just use to get on with it. I think its just self indulgence”

Well yeah, if 'getting on with it' was sticking your head in a fire.

People did still commit suicide in 'the olden days' or they 'got on with it' which often meant living life unhappily or self-medicating.

We live in a time where people don't just have to get by, we have the technology and understanding to get better.

What is self indulgent about wanting to be better? If anything I think that shows dedication and I don't know about you but I've never seen 'self-indulgent' and 'dedicated' as being interchangeable terms.



‘I won this award through hard work, dedication and self indulgence, just loads of self indulgence’

While I believe that it is now easier to deal with 'having a nervous break down' as we now have access to the tools like psychologists, psychiatrists and help groups; I don't believe that is the past people just never had break downs.

“This might be relevant to you”

Fuck off.
It isn't.

If somebody has skin cancer, you don't bring them a book on liver disease but for some reason, many find it difficult to grasp that with mental illness, just like other illnesses there are many different types and strands
.... so don't shove an article about Multiple-personality-disorder in my face and expect me to thank you for it.

I have been diagnosed with something called Schizo-effective-disorder which is sort of a mess of bipolar and schizophrenia rolled into one but the ways in which it effects a person are varied and there are as many variations as there are people who have it.

I have long periods of normality in between 'episodes'. Many people with bipolar will tell you that they have two modes, they are up or down.

For me this is not the case.

I can and have functioned well for long time without medication but will have times of elation (which just feels like you are really happy and drunk) and depression (which feels like the biggest, longest hangover of your life).

For many people with this illness, it will start to manifest in their teens.

For me, I was 19 when it started to present itself..well I think the mood disorder part was there much earlier but written off by everyone as just being your average 'moody teen'.

The other part, the psychosis (the word that scared me half to death when I heard it) began while I was living in Melbourne and had a series of Sydney pals visiting over the course of a week which left me with very minimal sleep.

For anybody who has tried to function over an extended period of time without sleep, I am sure you can identify that feeling of your sanity slowly slipping away from you 
Feeling you're so tired you could die then getting a second wind where everything is funny
....only to find it is short-lived and now you are more tired than ever

...well functioning with bipolar on no sleep is kind of like that
...only amplified by about a million.
If you throw in a bit of psychosis and you have yourself a party
A party I like to call schizo-effective-disorder.

I went through a few days in 2008 where I felt quite paranoid and threatened for no good reason.

I experienced visual and auditory hallucinations, which make for some pretty funny stories (including me wondering around Richmond in a 'disguise' that consisted of a top hat, trench coat scarf and sunglasses. I'll tell you about it some time).

Over two years (aged19-20) the amount of time I spend in hospital, combined, added up to close to 6 months. I was never violent in that time and resent media that only depicts people with mental illness as being aggressive because in my experience, this is rarely the case. For the most part, I was frightened ...perhaps even more so when I got to know my illness and understood that the threats I was feeling were not real.

The idea that I couldn't trust my own brain was more terrifying than any physical harm that I had previously been fearful of.

Before November,2012, it had been about 3½ years since I'd last been hospitalised and more than 2 years since I'd needed medication. In that time I had maintained regular work or study and was doing pretty well but just a week of interrupted sleep was enough to really mess with my emotions. Luckily I am at a point where I have gained a fair insight into my illness and can recognise warning signs and regulating my sleep has made a world of difference in a short time.

That's a pretty small look into my illness and if you spoke to another person with schizo-effective-disorder, they would have a completely different story to tell and have experienced series of different symptoms.

Every person is different so you can see why people with schizo-effective-disorder can be offended by being lumped together let alone thrown in with a bunch of other illnesses which share much more differences than they do similarities.

“I heard you like golf so I got you this book on skiing because golf is a sport and skiing is also a sport”



I think it's important not to stereotype everybody with a mental illness because if you really get to know a person you will realise all the differences and understand that a person suffering from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder does not want to be put in to the same category as a person with autism and visa-versa.

So yeah I will watch United States Of Tara with you and appreciate it for the humour and drama and Toni Collettes acting but no I do not want to read an entire fucking book on “How to deal with Multiple-Personality-Disorder” because it is no more relevant to me than it is to you.

“People use it as an excuse to get out of things or to get things”

I agree that some people are prone to do this but I don't think that is based on a mental illness but rather your own personality.
Myself, I don't enjoy people taking pity on me and if given the choice, I believe that most people would rather be an object of envy than one of pity... well I'd rather be a dolphin but I don't think that's in the cards.

Honestly when I went from 3months in hospital in 2009, surrounded by people feeling sorry for me and rules about when I could eat, sleep or use my phone...working a job starts to sound like a holiday.

The idea of staying in a hospital and maybe getting some centrelink benefits may sound cruisey at first ...but eventually most people would rather have control of their own life and be living it, well that's my belief anyway, though I think there can be a few exceptions to the rule as with anything.


"They take drugs so it's their fault. It was bound to happen"

While some people can go through their lives as drug users and still be functioning, some people have a predisposition that will make them susceptible to psychosis and when the drugs are taken out of the equation, they will instantly improve and maybe never have another psychotic episode after that.
While commonly accepted as 'a safe drug', marijuana is known for inducing psychosis.

My feeling is that blaming drug users for bringing on their own problems displays a very narrow minded way of thinking.
If you had a loved one who smoked cigarettes at some point in their life and one day was diagnosed with cancer would you just go "Oh well, they knew the risk, they deserve to die"?
If you would you are probably a bit of a dick head.

Apart from that, there is the obvious argument as to 'Why are they taking drugs in the first place?', Could there have been some previous depression or issues that they were trying to escape?

Do people that are actually genuinely happy need to rely on drugs to get them through day to day life? Are there other problems that have caused their substance abuse?

"Well if they are not going to take their medication then how can anybody help them?"


Taking medication is a personal choice (depending on the severity of the illness)
As I am high functioning, I have never been put on a community treatment order; like other more extreme cases, where people are forced to have an injection once a month.
If I chose to stop taking my medication tomorrow, nobody could do anything to stop me.

I will never know the pain of somebody who is forced to be permanently medicated and while I know it is often necessary, it does not stop it from being heart breaking.
While any time I have been hospitalised, I have gone of my own volition, I  have been held in hospital against my own will on every occasion due to deciding I am ready to go home on a whim and my doctors knowing that I am in no way ready.

I am lucky enough to have had the same doctor since I was 20 and for the most part to be treated at the same facility. On my last admission, I was moved to a new psychiatrist (as my previous doctor was part of the youth team) so I have received consistent treatment by somebody who is familiar with my case history.
Others do not have that luxury.

Any time that I have needed a medication change, I have refused to do it away from hospital, due to allergic reactions I have had in the past.
I have been very lucky in terms of being able to get a bed in an amazing public facility.
My heart goes out to those who have not been able to get a bed when they needed it.
It is unfortunate that there are very few places that cater to people who fall into the category of being 'a severe enough case'.

In the public system, I would say there are close to zero facilities in Australia that cater specifically to people who are in a transitional phase.

Those who are not psychotic and do not have a substance abuse problem but just need a medication change or a refuge from day-to-day life problems while adjusting to a new medication can often find themselves feeling very isolated.

 Even many private facilities are closing.
A Private hospital I stayed at last year [through a government initiative that leases a small number of private beds to the public health system] is now closing down.

...So this means that even if you are fortunate enough to be able to afford a bed in a private facility, you may not be able to get one...and if you can't afford one, you are screwed.

I mention this because a lack of beds in this country can lead to larger problems for people who find their medication is simply not working, in the most severe of cases, this can lead to suicide.

It upsets me enormously that people who need a special kind of help can be denied it because the help doesn't exist.

The government is doing many things to rectify this situation, by recognising that mental health issues in our country are rampant.
In my local area, [where mental illness rates are declared to be one of the highest in this country] there is new funding that means there are 100 new beds to be dedicated to mental health, which is amazing...
They are also allocating money for early intervention, which means many people can receive help before the point that they need to be hospitalised.

When it comes to people who need something as simple as a medication change and the amount of help needed can not be achieved, it is clear to me how easy it can be for somebody to just stop taking it.
I have on several occasions.

If you have to wait a week to see a doctor and you are experiencing symptoms that are relentless, you may feel like stopping the medication is a better option than taking it.
Initially you may even start to feel better without it but in many cases this is quickly followed by an acute period of escalating sickness.

For me, I have stopped taking medication for months at a time before anybody noticed.
To most people, I appeared well but my brain was operating in a very different way to the way it did when I was on medication.

After people close to me became aware of my decline and intervened by contacting my physicians, I  discussed going off my medication permanently and my doctor agreed as long as my consultations with my doctor and case worker were to be more frequent.

I was off medication from mid 2009- late 2012 and was considered to be 'well' by most peoples standards.
It's tough to talk about but  while I was functioning for the most part, working or studying during that whole time, there were many points where I knew that I needed to be on medication.

During this time I experienced  poor sleep and on  occasion delusional and disorganised thoughts.
On certain weeks I would go from being incredibly happy and elated to then being completely miserable and crying for no reason, sometimes this could even happen within the space of a few hours.
I would sometimes confuse dreams and reality, forgetting what I had said or done and finding that I was repeating myself, forgetting to do something or doing something and rechecking it several times.

I would get overly fixated on specific ideas and stay up for days trying to complete them.
After prolonged periods of no sleep, I experienced severe paranoia, as though I was being watched of followed and occasional small visual and auditory hallucinations (Thinking somebody was behind me or that I heard a distant scream or voice)

I constructed several strange rituals that I didn't know to be strange until I was no longer unwell.

For example, despite being Agnostic, when I would think a really awful thought about somebody and they became obsessive thoughts, I would do the christian sign of the cross.
It got way beyond ridiculous, to the point where I recognised it was insane and would do it in secret.
 So if I was around other people, I would touch my forehead, then five seconds later touch my chest then wait a while and touch my shoulders from left to right.

Even though I knew this behavior was irrational, I felt I had to do it just in case the one time that I didn't do it, something bad would happen.
Sometimes I did it just so I was able to move on from the specific thought and focus on what I was doing.
I know. Crazy.

I laugh about a lot of things now but at the time, I was living in my own personal hell.


Most of these symptoms of my schizo-effective-disorder only occurred rarely, usually when I was not getting enough sleep.
However one permanent characteristic was the sound of chatter in my head.
I never experienced auditory hallucinations that were clear, like hearing specific voices as some other people may experience.
Any chatter always seemed distant, [like when you are in a bar and can hear a lot of noise but not make out what anyone was saying] only when I would try to sleep, could I make out random words or sentences, but it was like people talking over each other or advertisements playing.

Other peoples experiences can be VERY different to mine.
Some will experience more intense or less intense versions of what I have and when it comes to medication, both can be equally as dangerous.

If your symptoms are not that apparent, you may go through life never being diagnosed.
I know that mental illness has been around further up my family tree but not discussed, I recently discovered that my Great-uncle committed suicide a long time ago, but it was kept a secret, even from my own mother.

There is no doubt in my mind that other family members have gone undiagnosed, due to not showing typical signs and the stigma that is carried in older generations.

As for more rigorous strands of schizophrenia and bipolar, people can be in denial that there is even anything wrong with them and go off medication completely, if they are experiencing false beliefs and are elevated emotionally, they may be more likely to take risks and indulge in dangerous behavior. Both the negative and 'positive symptoms' of these illnesses can be equally dangerous.

Being elated can result in them being physically dangerous to themselves due to thoughts of 'being invincible', it can cause problems in their work and social life.
For myself, in times when I was in an 'elated stage' I would disappear for up to days at a time and sometimes not go to class.

Often when I drank too much or sometimes when I didn't, I would be overly trusting and go off on little adventures with strangers, not tell anybody where I was and put myself in situations where I was vulnerable to physical danger.

On the other side of the spectrum, there are the obvious points with the 'negative' symptoms where people who are afraid of their hallucinations or suffering from their depression so badly that they don't know what else to do and are driven to suicide.

I talk about all of this because sometimes medication doesn't do its job.
Some people, like me are lucky to have found a medication that makes me feel clear headed but it can take getting used to.

When there are parts of yourself that you have known your whole life, you may not want to give them up.
For me it was incredibly difficult, which is why I only went on medication again last year and until a second medication was introduced earlier this year, I did not start to feel completely better.

 By 'better' I mean, having a clear head, no longer hearing a chatter that I had known my whole life, no longer feeling so euphoric that I lost touch with reality, lacked empathy and was unrealistic about certain goals or over-committing to things to the point where my physical health was at risk
.
By 'better' I mean, I no longer experienced the severe lows of not giving a shit what happened in life or hating my illness to the point where I wished I was dead.

By 'better' I do not mean I will ever be at complete peace with not experiencing the highs that I have experienced in my life. Those highs are beyond anything that I can explain and often last for months at a time and were the reason that I was never able to completely commit to medication before.

Myself, I am lucky. I use that word a lot because it's exactly what I am.
I am fortunate to have received amazing amount of support from people in my life, from doctors to family to friends and strangely from people that I never would have imagined even gave me a second thought.

I love my illness for what it has given me, an extreme amount of joy, amazing experiences, wonderful stories and for what it has taught me about other people.

I often see it as a weeding tool, because after the way it has caused me to behave at times, it has shown me all the people who are willing to never give up on me.

For me, it just came time to accept that if I am ever going to live the kind of life that I want for myself, I can not afford to be unwell. I can not afford the lack of empathy it causes or the inconsistency. I can not afford the complete self-indulgence that leaves me so stuck in myself that I am unable to notice the world going on around me.

It has cost me many relationships and I take complete responsibility for that.
When unwell, I have been outright cruel to family, friends and partners who did nothing to deserve it, which makes it all the more amazing to think that so many have stuck with me despite that.

 It's for myself and for those people that I can not afford to be unwell and have taken every step possible to try to ensure that I won't be.

I am lucky that my doctors found me the right medication and that I was given the attention and care that I needed to recover from something so harrowing to me.
I say that I am lucky because others are not.

While few people with a mental illness may choose to live a life completely without medication as they have found other ways to manage it, others can not always.

  For some people that try their whole lives to find the right medication, they may never find it.
Even though I have found it, I mourn the loss of a part of me that I can't get back as long as I am on it and I see exactly why some people will put up with the lows to keep the highs.


"Suicide is the lazy option"

Suicide is the saddest possible option NOT NOT THE LAZY OPTION.
It is a world of pain for those who are left to pick up the pieces.
Yet the pain of the person who takes their life is equally as terrible and can not be discounted by blame.

The best thing that people can do is to look out for their pals.
Ask how they are going and if you can, offer genuine assistance.

 Don't say
"Ask me if you need anything"

instead make a genuine offer like
"Can i come visit you?"
"Can I take you out today?"

Sometimes when people feel really low, they can't always tell you what they need because even though you have said you are available, they don't know how to ask for that help.

If you know somebody who has been affected by the suicide of a loved one, be there for them.

If a loved one is in pain from losing somebody to suicide, don't belittle them or think that they may not have known the person that well enough to be sad or that they are seeking attention.

There is a staggering amount of statistics that show how one suicide can often have a domino effect.

If you feel at risk of taking your own life, speak out, try to request help and be honest.
Confide in people close to you and seek medical attention.

I know what it can be like to feel so sad that you can feel trapped inside that sadness but please know that there are resources available to you

I have been talking forever and I have a million other things that I could say but I am going to put a bunch of links at the bottom of this that say more than I ever could


Mental illness is something that I have been dealing with my entire life and until I was 19, I never had any answers as to why I felt so drastically different to most people.
I assumed that if I took medication that I would be cured.
I know now that is not the case, it takes work and understanding but every day I find myself getting better and being able to again love the things that at one point I forgot I ever loved.

I share my story in the hopes that others will share theirs too, seek help when it’s needed and discuss these issues with their family and friends, whether or not they are effecting you personally.
At some point in our lives we will all be effected by illness. Whether or not we identity with it. It’s important to recognise signs in the early stages and make those around you feel like they don’t have to hide.

When people ask me what schizo-effective disorder feels like for me, I describe it as when you laugh so hard that your cheeks hurt. It is feeling joy and pain simultaneously.
You want to stop laughing because it hurts but you don't want to stop because it feels so good.

That's the way I have lived forever and now
I am learning a new kind of happiness
________________________


Websites for specific groupsIf you are seeking help for yourself or a friend, I have listed a few websites that cater to different, more specific needs.
I hope it helps.
At the bottom of this page are a few statistics and interesting facts from a couple of other sites 

Michaela xx

_____________________
Males are 4 times more likely to commit suicide than womenThis site is amazing. Every person should visit it

http://softenthefckup.com.au/

It has a bunch of resources, personal stories, videos and advice on helping loved ones battling with depression________________
Gay, lesbian and trans gender people face unique struggles, this website is specifically designed to help

http://gayhelpline.com/
________________________________

Teenagers are often misunderstood by people of different ages. If you need to talk to somebody or if you know a young person who you'd like to reach out to, these websites may be helpful

http://www.teenmentalhealth.org/


http://www.headspace.org.au/
___________________
Postnatal depression is different from other kinds of depression, check out this site if you're a new baby-mamma or know one who you are concerned about
http://www.panda.org.au/


___________________
This is a great site for all women. it covers all aspects of women's health

http://womenshealth.com/

_________________________-
This site is awesome, it is constantly being updated with new information. It is great for anybody to read

http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/
Another good'n to answer general questions;

http://www.mindspot.org.au/

________________


Facts about mental illness from http://www.sane.org

"

What are the figures?

• Nearly half (45%) of the population will experience a mental disorder at some stage in their lives.

• Almost one in five Australians (20%) will experience a mental illness in a 12-month period.

• During a one-year period, anxiety disorders will affect 14% of the population and depression will affect 6%.

• Depression is one of the most common conditions in young people and increases during adolescence.

• At least one third of young people have had an episode of mental illness by the time they are 25 years old.

• Research indicates that people receiving treatment for a mental illness are no more violent or dangerous than the
  general population.

• People living with a mental illness are more likely to be victims of violence, especially self-harm.

• Mental illnesses are not purely ‘psychological’ and can have many physical features.

• Anyone can develop a mental illness and no one is immune to mental health problems.

• Most people with mental illness recover well and are able to lead fulfilling lives in the community when they receive appropriate ongoing treatment and support.

• Women were more likely than men to use services for mental health problems. Approximately two-thirds of people with a mental illness do not receive treatment in a 12-month period.

• It is estimated that up to 85% of homeless people have a mental illness.

How do I find out more?
It is important to ask your doctor about any concerns you have.
SANE Australia also produces a range of easy-to-read publications and multimedia resources on mental illness.
"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If you are feeling like shit and looking at puppies or videos of laughing babies isn't helping:

http://www.suicideprevention.com.au/ provides links to services and stories that will help you out

"

Please read this if you are desperate.

Painful conditions always pass, both mental and physical. Life always changes, and better times will come back inevitably.
Do not decide to harm yourself for a problem that will pass.

• If you need help right now and want to speak to a friendly voice without judgment, call one of the available Australian suicide helplines

• Are you worried about a friend?
  Here are some questions to ask and how to provide support for someone who is in crisis.

Please do not make major decisions about your life when you are depressed, or have taken alcohol or drugs.
You would never advise a friend to die because of their problems. Tell yourself what you would tell a friend.



You would always tell a friend to Hold On.

If you are distressed, why not go to sleep for a while? Your brain will have solved many problems when you wake.
The Suicide Prevention Australia website provides information for people and their families who are dealing with depression, mental illness or other stressful situations that can lead people to feel suicidal.

We aim to provide helpful articles for people of all age groups and backgrounds who may be suffering a stressful event or illness that is causing thoughts of suicide.

• Women
• Men
• Teens
• Gay Youth
• Gay Adults

We provide a free ebook to help you understand and deal with depression, just enter your details in the form to your top right.
We need your ongoing support and an easy way for you to help is to become a Supporter Against Suicide (SAS), with a donation of $20.

"I Am Glad I Survived!"

"I cannot believe I had thoughts of suicide" is a very common statement when people like you have recovered from a very stressful event or illness. Suicidal thoughts can happen to anyone, but they will fade away if you fight them, talk to friends, or get professional help.

If you can provide your story, please email us with details. You can remain anonymous, but we would also like prominent Australian people to tell us how they managed to win the battle against depression, stress or suicidal thoughts. Email editor@suicideprevention.com.au. "

________________________-


If you need somebody to talk to
Suicide prevention list these helplines

" If you or someone you know is feeling suicidal, know that there are many people who will gladly assist you if you let them know you have a problem. If you don’t feel that you can talk to friends or family, there are many services available in Australia to support you. If you’re not ready to talk to anyone but are looking for strategies to help you cope with your feelings right now, see this help page. If you are assisting someone in crisis and need help, here are some strategies.
   Suicide Help Line - Australian Services Lifeline 24 hour crisis support -13 11 14  
Suicide Prevention Foundation (24/7) - 1800 HOLDON (1800 465 366)  
Suicide Callback - 1300 659 467 in every State (9 am -8.30pm) Hospitals  
You can call the emergency department of any hospital in Australia.
If you do not have the number, call directory enquiries and the operator will give you the number of your nearest emergency department. GPs, Counsellors, Psychiatrists or Psychologists You can also call your local doctor, or you psychologist or psychiatrist if you have one. They often have an emergency number for out of hours emergencies. Other Local Services and Support If you run a support service in Australia and would like to add it to this list, please email us at - editor at suicideprevention.au Back to Suicide Prevention Australia Home from Suicide Help Line 

Government Matters

The lead up to election is always irritating. It features a lot more personal attacks and very little talk about policy.

I know all politicians face a crazy amount of mockery in all aspects of their life and most dish it out as good as they get it, including Julia Gillard

but seriously fuck this.




Apparently being married with kids would make her a more viable candidate for leader of our country?

In my opinion, the Liberal party are a backward bunch of dicks who live in the Stone-age.


I see voting for them and choosing Tony Abbot to represent this country as something that will not only be an embarrassment because he is a narrow -minded cockhead but because all the things that party represent are likeminded to his views.

Have fun living in your racist, sexist, homophobic country with a guy that seriously has claimed ‘climate change does not exist’ to represent us to the rest of the world.

The only people Liberals are going to help are the people that don’t need help.

I feel that if you honestly think that Labour are ruining this country then you have never even looked at any other country.

The former LIBERAL Prime Minister said this:

　



Yet so much of the mainstream media seems to suggest differently
This is a great read if you have time;

http://theaimn.com/2013/06/16/dont-write-crap/

It shows how much of the media is not being impartial
Ended with a great speech by our Prime Minister

Please get over Julia Gillards hair and her vagina and don’t vote for or against her based on her genitals.

Please, please, please read up on the party that you plan to vote for this election and don’t make the mistake of voting because of some story you saw on A Current Affair.

Don’t vote for a party because somebody else told you to or because it’s who your parents vote for.

Don’t just think about yourself in this election and what you, personally have to gain from voting for a specific party but think about how their policies are going to benefit the country as a whole.

Know that the Labour and Liberal party are not your only options and there are other Independent parties that you can vote for and use your preferences.

Those other parties may not be strong enough to run our country just yet, but if they are able to get a seat, they are who can also help to contribute to real change.



If you are unsure about something, contact your local M.P and ask for an answer about the things that matter most to you

　

The last election showed just how close of a call it can be

Make your vote count because it does.

Homophobia is gay [Why being gay is like being ugly]

If you talk about gay rights, there are some people who will assume you are gay.

I think that shows an insane amount of selfishness about those people

“WHAT? YOU CARE ABOUT WHETHER GAY PEOPLE CAN GET MARRIED? YOU MUST LOVE EATING PUSSY!”
Can I just say that I actually don’t? It hurts your tongue after a while

Obviously you are only allowed to care about things that affect your day to day life. Right?

What is Empathy?

EM-PATH- EEEY?

Is that some kind of medical practice?

‘Hello I’m an empatholigist’

The question shouldn’t be 'why do I care about whether gay people should be able to get married' but 'Why do YOU think it's your right to decide whether gay people can get married?'
...even though it does not affect you AT. ALL?

…though I enjoy a good pair of boobs as much as the next man, I am never going to marry a women unless it is Michelle Williams.

Despite my nickname ‘Mikgayla’ that was given to me by a friend,

I love the D.

I can see why gay dudes would also love the D.

Dicks are awesome in a really ugly kind of way.

They kind of look like how a worm would look if you put a beanie on it.




And I see why gay women like other women.

Women are fucking awesome too and boobs are fantastic.

Women are mostly just better to look at than men

They are easier to talk to than men.

They look better naked than men

…honestly if I did like to eat pussy I would be the biggest lesbian ever.

I would just be lezing it up 24/7

And I would want to get married.

Gay marriage shouldn’t even be a question.

Gay people already raise families and produce children and as far as I know the world hasn’t ended yet.

Gay men can already suck each others dicks and fuck each other in the ass in this country and there is nothing you can do about it.

They can do this:


....and this:

...and this




But you won’t let them have a piece of paper?

There are gay men, right now in their rooms just sucking each other and fingering each others ass holes and they can do that.

That’s allowed

And you know what?

You don’t have to watch them if that grosses you out

and I am pretty sure they don’t want to watch you with your beer gut and tiny penis, having sweaty disgusting sex with your equally unattractive girlfriend.

　

If the fact is you don’t want people to BE gay. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it.

A lot of the world would prefer that people weren’t ugly but there are ugly people

There is nothing I, or anybody else can do about just how physically unattractive some people are.

They were born ugly and they are ugly and there is NOTHING they can do to change their appearance.

They visit a surgeon and he’s like

“No dude even I can‘t help you”

There are a lot of ugly people that are just shitty people and I don’t like them.

But there are a lot of ugly people who are really nice or really smart or really funny and able to change the world and I like them.

Some of my favourite people in the world are ugly.

Their ugliness doesn’t make them bad people, in fact for some it makes them more interesting.

　

I love you man. I am sorry I keep calling you ugly in all my blog posts. I would seriously bang the shit out of you

I can hear you saying:

“WHAT THE FUCK MICHAELA? ARE YOU SAYING HOMOSEXUAL PEOPLE ARE UGLY PEOPLE? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?”

Calm down, I am not.

I have a point to get to if you will just let me.

Some people are born ugly and some people are born gay.

Some ugly people are total wankers

and so are some gay people

and so are some attractive people

and so are some hetrosexual people.

Your level of attractiveness is not something you can change [without surgery]

You are just born that way.

You have a horrible nose and a forehead that takes up half of your face

You fall into the top 10% of the worlds most repulsive people to look at

People flee in the streets when they see you

Mothers cover up their children’s eyes

…O.k now I actually am getting a tad off track



Like ugliness, homosexuality is something you are born with.

You don’t learn to be ugly. You just are.


...well most of the time

I am not saying that being gay is the same as being ugly…more often than not, we all know that isn’t true.

I’m looking at you Portia DeRossi

Yet in this world being gay can be like being ugly. They face many similar problems.

Gay people and ugly people have to try harder at things than straight and attractive people because much of the world seems to have a generally negative attitude toward them for what they are rather than who they are.

When you are really ugly, you already know that in the dating world there is a limited amount of people that will actually sleep with you….you are in the bottom 10% so lets assume, you are limited to that group of people, unless you are famous or rich.

As gay people make up [approximately] only 10% of the population also, their dating chances are also limited unless they are famous or rich.

No seriously. Portia DeRossi


Who wouldn’t turn for her?

Gay people are persecuted by strangers for not wanting to hide who they are…much like ugly people are persecuted by strangers for leaving the house without covering their face with a bag.

　

...the similarities are endless (probably not)

If you don’t want people to BE gay. There is nothing you can do about it in the same way that you can’t make an ugly person ‘not ugly’

The thing is ugly people are allowed to get married.

There is a website dedicated to them
http://www.thedistractionnetwork.com/ugly-married-couples/


I do not care if ugly people get married

I do not care if gay people get married

What I care about is if stupid, narrow minded, shitty people get married because they are then allowed to produce shitty children who think they have the right to make decisions about another persons life.

I feel like homophobic people are just generally really selfish, bored people in general because why on earth would you deny somebody something that will in no way affect you?
... and since there is not much else I can say on the topic that hasn’t already been said, I will leave you with a series of other great people saying great stuff about homophobia









































And some sweet pictures of gay couples...Seriously How could you object to this?